Inbox for duplicity

[chopoffyourhead]

Username: rosehearts

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[eelusive]

[With crumbs all over his shirt, Floyd continues, oblivious to how taken aback Riddle is.]

That's what people do, right? When you hang out and give gifts, it's technically a date.

[Sure, merfolk have dates too, but maybe the nuances are a little different?]

If I give you more gifts, can I get my hopes up then?

[chopoffyourhead]

In the roughest sense of the word, I suppose.

[Sometimes he wonders about the knowledge disparity between Floyd and Azul when it came to land-dwellers.

Also Floyd you are a mess.]

I won't go out with you if you eat like that, for the record.

[And the final part gets a look of frustration.]

It's not about gifts! Were you not listening to what I just said?

[eelusive]

[Azul and Jade knew far more about the land than Floyd ever did, and he won't be surprised if they still do.

He completely ignores the part about eating "like that." Whatever that means.]

Hm? What'd you say?

[He's too busy thinking about the ways he's going to prepare his gifts.]

[chopoffyourhead]

[He massages his temples. Great Seven, give him strength.]

I said. Sexual acts are difficult for me. And the number of gifts isn't going to change that.

[eelusive]

Oh. Welllll if you want 'em to be easier, then we'll practice.

[In his excitement, clearly Floyd is going to be making all the decisions here and now. Apologies.]

You like learning anyway, right? So I'll teach you.

[Never mind Floyd is a terrible teacher.]

[chopoffyourhead]

[A sigh, softer this time.]

... very well, I'll consent to that, so long as the pace isn't rushed. —so that I don't feel too rushed.

[always have to specify with an octavinelle]

As for a date, you'll likely have to get somewhere that isn't run by natives, since I doubt they would serve two Submissives.

[He gestures.]

I can make time in my schedule for it this coming weekend on Saturday.

[eelusive]

Yay~!

[He's got to get better at not yay-ing. It's not sexy. Maybe it's cute and attractive to some, but it's not sexy.]

It doesn't have to be outside, y'know. If you wanna eat stuff, I can make stuff! That way we don't gotta ask permission to buy anything.

[And assuming he'll be in a good mood that day, said stuff will be delicious. Floyd finally brushes the remaining crumbs off his shirt as he makes his way into the living room to flop on his stomach on the couch.]

And you can make stuff too if you wanna. That one breakfast you made before was pretty good, Goldfishie.

[chopoffyourhead]

[Not sexy, but it is endearing. What a ridiculous merman.]

Dates traditionally take place in a restaurant so the couple can spend the most time together without having to worry about cooking or clean-up.

That said, while I wouldn't be opposed... You cook, Floyd?

[He doesn't sound disbelieving. Intrigued if anything.

He gives a smile and crosses his arms.]

With a good cookbook and the necessary items, it's just a matter of following the instructions.

[Just don't ask him to improvise. Ever.]

[eelusive]

Azul’s family gets tons of dates at their restaurant back home. But that’s all traditional stuff. I wanna be different~

[Cooking together sounds like the perfect experience. Chaotic, yes, but perfect.]

‘course I know how. I came up with over half the menu at Mostro Lounge~ And when I don’t feel like serving, I’m cooking in the back. Azul’s a super picky eater too, but he never turns down the chance to eat what I make him.

[Unless Floyd’s in a terrible mood and likely mistook salt for sugar or dumped an entire can of olives into a batch of ice cream all because it sounded fun in the moment.]

Soooo~ We should make something together, ok? What’s your favorite kinda food?

[chopoffyourhead]

Hmm. [A slight amusement to his tone.] Very well.

[Floyd might give him a bit of a headache now and then, but... it's still worth it. Trying new things with him.]

Did you? Impressive. I'm surprised I'm only now learning of your talents.

Hm... I enjoy a wide variety of dishes, though I much prefer healthy dishes using fresh ingredients.

[........... says the straight-laced teen who was practically forced to eat healthy all the time...]

[eelusive]

Huhuhu~ I’m a genius, you know.

[A lazy one, but a genius nonetheless. Floyd doesn’t usually care about impressing other people, but if they’re strong and interesting and fun, then that’s a different story.]

Really? Crabby says you’re big into sweets like cake and tarts, though. If they make you happy, then aren’t those healthy?

[chopoffyourhead]

Are you, really?

[Riddle's not actually gotten a lot of exposure around Floyd that wasn't focused on him, and now he's rather curious...

The next part gets a clearing of his throat, red coming to his cheeks as he glances away.]

Those are desserts meant to be had sparingly. I believe our conversation was about meals.

[eelusive]

Yuh-huh~ Learning and getting full scores on tests are easy. It’s just that sometimes they’re too easy and then they get boring and I don’t wanna do ‘em anymore.

[He shrugs… but there’s no denying the increasing red on Riddle’s cheeks.]

Goldfishie~ I asked ‘bout “food.” So that’s not specific to meals. And anyway, anything’s a meal if you eat enough of it~ Do you wanna eat ten strawberry tarts? That sounds kinda fun~

[chopoffyourhead]

[Hm... that makes sense. And Floyd's not someone to lie about this sort of thing.

—augh.]

That is simply untrue.

[Re: anything's a meal if you eat enough of it.]

No. I'm fairly certain I'd get sick from eating that many sweets. And anyway, part of dessert's appeal is that it's dessert— something to be served after the main course. Barring specific occasions.

I have no desire to fill up on empty calories and experience a massive sugar crash, thank you.

[eelusive]

Ugh, when you start talkin’ ‘bout the calories, you sound like Azul. It’s just food.

[Floyd’s never been able to get behind the whole dieting thing. He and Jade eat more than enough of their weight in whatever they want every day because they have to… plus a little extra on the side because they want to. Or at least Floyd wants to.]

Anyway, you promise we’re gonna date this weekend right? Extra promise?

[“Go on a date,” is what he should say, but you get the idea.]

[chopoffyourhead]

Yes, well, humans have a bit different metabolism from merfolk. We're not an exclusively predatory species, for one. That means we don't have to burn through the food as fast as you do.

That requires us to be more selective about what we're putting in our bodies and just how much. A day of sweets might not necessarily hurt anyone in the long run, for example, but a pattern of it will both cause a person to become overweight as well as malnourished.

... as for myself, I simply don't like dealing with the sugar high and sugar crash that comes from excessive eating of sweets.

[A small, charmed smile.]

But yes, we'll go on a date. Promise. What sort of foods do you like most, Floyd?

[eelusive]

Mmhm, ok, ok~

[So he’ll be making him ten strawberry tarts then. Though he will admit a “sugar high” and “sugar crash” both sound fascinating. Never mind he experiences something akin to those every day.

He perks up a bit and responds with a gleeful,]

Octopus~!

[cough]

[chopoffyourhead]

[Oh Floyd. Well, he'll have to be making them on his own time then, because Riddle won't participate in that foolishness. Unless it turns out to be for other people too.

The enthusiastic response gets a blink and raised eyebrows for a moment.]

... well, you are an eel merfolk after all. It makes me wonder all the more about how your relationship with Azul started.

[eelusive]

Oh, you wanna know? It’s not that interesting and Azul’d probably tell you it went different.

[Floyd rolls onto his back and holds his device above his head. Mm, Riddle isn’t red or even pink-ish anymore, but that’s ok, he supposes. He still has that recorded video of him laughing to refer back to later.]

He got picked on a lot when we were in middle school, so he spent a ton of time holed up alone in a little pot. By the time Jade ‘n I noticed him, we found out he’d been scribbling magic circles on every rock and shell. Stuff like how to take away someone’s voice or exchange their tail fins for a different one…

[Floyd’s eyes seem to light up as he recalls it.]

We’d never seen someone be that dedicated to spells before, so we kept coming back every day to see what he’d draw up next. At some point we even wiggled into the pot with him to get a closer look and he didn’t try to kick us out~

[A giggle follows before Floyd shrugs.]

It’s not like me and Jade were ever picked on ‘cause of how strong we were… but kids didn’t really wanna hang around us either. Azul was kinda the exception.

[chopoffyourhead]

[Riddle listens quietly. His brow furrows slightly as he listens.

At the end of it, he gives a thoughtful hum.]

I see...

[He supposes this is what Azul meant by the brothers finding him interesting. Or at least part of it.]

And... you don't feel at all awkward eating octopus when he's part octopus. Of course you don't.

[Hmmm.]

So I suppose it also wouldn't bother you if I ate eel.

[eelusive]

'course not~ He makes funny faces when I eat takoyaki, but what's he gonna do about it? I'm a growing eel and I gotta eat~

[Sure, the twins will coo about how delicious Azul looks when he's in his natural form and likewise Azul will go on about grilled eel bowls when it's a particularly rough day at the Lounge... but that's all it ever is.]

Hmn? Why would it bother me? You gotta eat too.

[In the sea, it's kill or be killed, after all. Doesn't matter if they're not in the sea right now. Everyone has to survive somehow.]

Pffhaha~ Does Goldfishie wanna eat me now?

[chopoffyourhead]

[Floyd Pls.]

Not you in particular. I'd rather avoid eating anything sentient or close to it.

[He thinks for a moment, hand up to his chin.

And then, he gestures with said hand.]

How about crab cakes? I don't believe they're too difficult to make, and I'm sure I can find a reasonably healthy recipe for it.

[Yeah you're gonna be hearing the "healthy" thing a lot from him, Floyd.]

[eelusive]

[Oh darn. And here he was hoping to be the first ever moray eel to be devoured by a goldfish. You'd get bragging rights for that, Riddle.]

Ooh, I like those~ Shellfish is another fave of mine! I mean, they're super annoying to crack open and rip all the meat out, but they taste sweet~

[Healthy, schmealthy. Just so long as it tastes good, he'll be behind it.]

Want me to hunt some from the ocean? I'm good at that~

[Excuse him as he tries to fit in every opportunity to show off his skills during their date. He's impressive, isn't he? Isn't he?]

[chopoffyourhead]

[No eating sentient beings! Bad Floyd!

Riddle looks amused, for his part.]

Assuming you can find some, certainly.

[It'd sure cut down on expenses.]

[eelusive]

[Floyd doesn't really care about costs, but with the number of times Azul's forced the information down his throat, he can theoretically keep budgets in mind for important stuff. Like new shoes. Or more designer ripped hoodies.

Or dates.

He flashes Riddle a cheeky grin.]

Hehhh~? Is that a challenge, Goldfishie?