Inbox for duplicity

[chopoffyourhead]

Username: rosehearts

Comments

[eelusive]

Ugh, when you start talkin’ ‘bout the calories, you sound like Azul. It’s just food.

[Floyd’s never been able to get behind the whole dieting thing. He and Jade eat more than enough of their weight in whatever they want every day because they have to… plus a little extra on the side because they want to. Or at least Floyd wants to.]

Anyway, you promise we’re gonna date this weekend right? Extra promise?

[“Go on a date,” is what he should say, but you get the idea.]

[chopoffyourhead]

Yes, well, humans have a bit different metabolism from merfolk. We're not an exclusively predatory species, for one. That means we don't have to burn through the food as fast as you do.

That requires us to be more selective about what we're putting in our bodies and just how much. A day of sweets might not necessarily hurt anyone in the long run, for example, but a pattern of it will both cause a person to become overweight as well as malnourished.

... as for myself, I simply don't like dealing with the sugar high and sugar crash that comes from excessive eating of sweets.

[A small, charmed smile.]

But yes, we'll go on a date. Promise. What sort of foods do you like most, Floyd?

[eelusive]

Mmhm, ok, ok~

[So he’ll be making him ten strawberry tarts then. Though he will admit a “sugar high” and “sugar crash” both sound fascinating. Never mind he experiences something akin to those every day.

He perks up a bit and responds with a gleeful,]

Octopus~!

[cough]

[chopoffyourhead]

[Oh Floyd. Well, he'll have to be making them on his own time then, because Riddle won't participate in that foolishness. Unless it turns out to be for other people too.

The enthusiastic response gets a blink and raised eyebrows for a moment.]

... well, you are an eel merfolk after all. It makes me wonder all the more about how your relationship with Azul started.

[eelusive]

Oh, you wanna know? It’s not that interesting and Azul’d probably tell you it went different.

[Floyd rolls onto his back and holds his device above his head. Mm, Riddle isn’t red or even pink-ish anymore, but that’s ok, he supposes. He still has that recorded video of him laughing to refer back to later.]

He got picked on a lot when we were in middle school, so he spent a ton of time holed up alone in a little pot. By the time Jade ‘n I noticed him, we found out he’d been scribbling magic circles on every rock and shell. Stuff like how to take away someone’s voice or exchange their tail fins for a different one…

[Floyd’s eyes seem to light up as he recalls it.]

We’d never seen someone be that dedicated to spells before, so we kept coming back every day to see what he’d draw up next. At some point we even wiggled into the pot with him to get a closer look and he didn’t try to kick us out~

[A giggle follows before Floyd shrugs.]

It’s not like me and Jade were ever picked on ‘cause of how strong we were… but kids didn’t really wanna hang around us either. Azul was kinda the exception.

[chopoffyourhead]

[Riddle listens quietly. His brow furrows slightly as he listens.

At the end of it, he gives a thoughtful hum.]

I see...

[He supposes this is what Azul meant by the brothers finding him interesting. Or at least part of it.]

And... you don't feel at all awkward eating octopus when he's part octopus. Of course you don't.

[Hmmm.]

So I suppose it also wouldn't bother you if I ate eel.

[eelusive]

'course not~ He makes funny faces when I eat takoyaki, but what's he gonna do about it? I'm a growing eel and I gotta eat~

[Sure, the twins will coo about how delicious Azul looks when he's in his natural form and likewise Azul will go on about grilled eel bowls when it's a particularly rough day at the Lounge... but that's all it ever is.]

Hmn? Why would it bother me? You gotta eat too.

[In the sea, it's kill or be killed, after all. Doesn't matter if they're not in the sea right now. Everyone has to survive somehow.]

Pffhaha~ Does Goldfishie wanna eat me now?

[chopoffyourhead]

[Floyd Pls.]

Not you in particular. I'd rather avoid eating anything sentient or close to it.

[He thinks for a moment, hand up to his chin.

And then, he gestures with said hand.]

How about crab cakes? I don't believe they're too difficult to make, and I'm sure I can find a reasonably healthy recipe for it.

[Yeah you're gonna be hearing the "healthy" thing a lot from him, Floyd.]

[eelusive]

[Oh darn. And here he was hoping to be the first ever moray eel to be devoured by a goldfish. You'd get bragging rights for that, Riddle.]

Ooh, I like those~ Shellfish is another fave of mine! I mean, they're super annoying to crack open and rip all the meat out, but they taste sweet~

[Healthy, schmealthy. Just so long as it tastes good, he'll be behind it.]

Want me to hunt some from the ocean? I'm good at that~

[Excuse him as he tries to fit in every opportunity to show off his skills during their date. He's impressive, isn't he? Isn't he?]

[chopoffyourhead]

[No eating sentient beings! Bad Floyd!

Riddle looks amused, for his part.]

Assuming you can find some, certainly.

[It'd sure cut down on expenses.]

[eelusive]

[Floyd doesn't really care about costs, but with the number of times Azul's forced the information down his throat, he can theoretically keep budgets in mind for important stuff. Like new shoes. Or more designer ripped hoodies.

Or dates.

He flashes Riddle a cheeky grin.]

Hehhh~? Is that a challenge, Goldfishie?

[chopoffyourhead]

[He gives him a smirk in return.]

Not for an apex predator such as yourself.

[He leans a bit closer to the camera.]

Do you want a challenge?

[eelusive]

[It could easily be mistaken for little more than a shadow in the low light, but it's there nonetheless: the softest, slightest touch of rose beneath Floyd's mismatched eyes.

He brings the device closer in kind.]

Ehehehee~ Are you gonna gimme one~?

[chopoffyourhead]

[What an endearing goober.]

How many crabs do you think you could catch in an hour on a good day, Floyd?

[eelusive]

Wehehe~ Lemme think...

[He hardly ever keeps track of the total unless he's having a particularly important challenge with his brother, but if he had to guesstimate given the tides and the water temperature and the overall view from down there... and that he'll be operating alone--]

50~

[They definitely won't need that many crabs for only a few crab cakes. Still, it's doable if he really puts in the effort.]

1/2

[chopoffyourhead]

Wait— really??

[Great Seven, in just one hour? Seems he overestimated how much time Floyd will need.]

2/2

[chopoffyourhead]

[He clears his throat.]

Very well... fifty crabs in thirty minutes. I'll have a reward for if you hit your target.

[Looks like Riddle will have to do some math. He wonders if Jamil and Azul like crab.]

1/2

[eelusive]

[If he really focuses and really pays attention to his time and his breathing and his speed, then catching fifty crabs will be like little elver's play.

Floyd abruptly sits up on that note. Ugh, can't he just go catch them now while he's raring to go?]

Yeah really. It's been a while since I've gone on a hunt, but I'm not rusty.

[Is he puffing up for Riddle or just being himself? To be fair, as skilled as he is, Floyd isn't one to be boastful... not unless he really, really wants to impress someone.]

2/2

[eelusive]

[Thirty minutes though? Thirty minutes.

For a "reward" he hasn't asked to clarify and that could very well be the tiniest, most useless thing.

... Floyd's tongue peeks out from between his teeth and swipes the corner of his lips before he replies, his tone quiet yet unmistakably, unabashedly eager.]

Yes sir~

[chopoffyourhead]

[Look at him, so excited. Riddle's smile widens just the touch.]

It's a deal. I'll come get you Saturday morning, and we can head to the beach together.

I assume the temperature won't be a problem for you.

[Merperson and all.]

[eelusive]

[Definitely for the best that Riddle comes to pick him up, because Floyd will be supremely not on time otherwise.]

Nuh-uh, no way. You could stick me in a freezer and I'd be too hot.

[In more ways than one. But Floyd will leave that unsaid. For now.]

Come to think of iiit~ You haven't seen me when I'm in my usual form, have you, Goldfishie?

[chopoffyourhead]

I haven't.

Should I come a little early to make time to properly appreciate it?

[eelusive]

Appreciate it? You can just see it when I--

[Swim? In the water? And hunt crabs?

... Floyd abruptly pauses. He'd drop his phone on his face if he were still lying down.]

--Ohhh. Yeah...! Yeah, you totally should!

[chopoffyourhead]

[...cute...]

Can you breathe out of water in your true form? Or would you need a potion?

[...since, well... Riddle going into the ocean isn't exactly an option.]

[eelusive]

Yuh-huh~ It gets weird after an hour or two, but nothin' I can't handle.

[Assuming he's not exerting too much energy. Or in this case, being "appreciated" too hard.]

Uhh... Maybe I oughta warn you though like I did for Sea Snake.

[That's courteous, isn't it? Especially before and on a date.]

I'm pretty huge.

[He's not talking about a specific part of him, but-- Yeah. Yeah, he's huge.]